An aphid on my plate
Who knew bugs can hide out in broccoli?
I didn’t until I almost fed some to my kids. In some cultures eating bugs is a delicacy. In my house, eating bugs is something straight from one of the Nine Circles of Hell from Dante’s Inferno. Just letting the word ‘bug’ roll off your tongue is enough to send my wife and kids ducking for cover. Every time they see a bug, Mobb Deep’s “Shook Ones” starts playing in my mind.
That said, knowingly eating bugs is unconscionable in my household.
When I almost fed my kids bug-infested broccoli, I seriously thought I was going to need a GoFundMe page for alimony, child support, legal fees, and a change of identity. Thankfully, my kids didn’t actually eat the broccoli, but I still felt bad—mostly because I ATE some of the critter-filled broccoli and my wife was giving me a soul-shattering side eye. Before you all judge me, let me share my story and point out that bugs called aphids can commonly hang out in broccoli.
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